Last night,

I helped my mom host a baby shower for one of our friends, and boy did it make me want to hurry up and get married so I can have my own little one on the way! But my turn will come in time and if was even half as fun as last night I will be set.

 The mommy to be.

and of course they had to be funny!

Fridays with the family

I spent today with my cute little baby sister, dad and his wife. And I can't even begin to say how cute she is!

Sadly, I forgot to bring even my phone along for some pictures, 

but here are some of her last year.

Enjoy!

Lately,

This week so far has been pretty slow.

plenty of cleaning on my part.

and taking care of little miss Cleo who is getting bigger by the minute.

I'm also pretty obsessed with my new nail polish.

For me it's the perfect blend of red and orange. 

and I looove it! 

I always love answering my phone and hearing "hello my future wife."

Totally makes my day.

He completes me.

 ♥

 

A very busy weekend

 

The super cute and awesome diaper cake I made.

The weekend was definitely a busy one. Tons of shopping for supplies so I could make

a diaper cake for a very pregnant friend's shower next week,

shopping for college clothes (getting super excited)

Buying books and such for said college,

Going to the vet to take care of my other baby, 

movie outings with my family and tons of walks with the cutest puppy ever.

My latest obsession

Chalkboard Paint!

 I reeeeeally love this idea!

Partly because of the classic/vintagey feel it gives the room

and just how plan rad it is! 

You can leave your man a nice sweet note, write out your grocery list or just draw cutesie pictures. 

I will definitely be doing this once I have a house that I can paint.

♥

About me,

1. I have an obsession with wanting way too many animals, but luckily I have a great guy who centers me.

2. I've had one serious relationship starting when I was 16 and yep, we are still together :)

3. I love love LOVE scarves, hats and nail polish.

4. I start cosmetology school in three weeks! Eeeeeeeee! 

5. I grew up with an abusive father and use to be terrified to tell anyone, but having Nick by my side has been the best gift and I can't imagine life without him.

6. I listen to music every morning when I wake up + every night before bed. 

7. I spend way too much time daydreaming about my future. Going to school and graduating, getting my first couple tattoos and living in a vintage house baking for my future hubby :)

8. Sometimes I wish I was in a band so I could travel and do amazing things, but then I remember how much I'd rather be around my amazing family. 

9. My mom is my best friend. We get along so well and I can always count on her to support me through life.

10. I'm really starting to love my life again and can not wait to start and graduate school!

YUM!

 

i love leaving for twenty minutes with my mom

just to sit and talk.. starbucks' coffee helps too :)

But seriously, my mom and I have such awesome convos and 

i never have to worry about not being myself around her.

love. love. love.

going to lay back down, hope the wind takes me around

Last night was an equaled mess of stress anxiety and nerves. Spork ruptured a disk by his back legs in the last few days which caused him to not want to move at all yesterday. After Odie died four months ago I've become a super freak and immediately took him to the pet e.r. here. Two hours of x-rays, shots and just waiting around and spork was sent home with pain meds and strict orders so stay in a crate. After much anxiety all of last night sleeping on the floor by him to make sure nothing happened.. he finally seems a little more like my little shit.

here are some pics of him and cleo
+ my awesome dinner i made right before everything happened.

 

Swoooon

This month so far is getting better + more about the future I can 

finally see myself in. Which is so very awesome :)

Went to my first show it what feels like ages. 

Christina Perri is not only a very talented singer, but her lyrics grab hold of your

heart and soul and threaten to never let go. 

World meet Cleo!

 

She is my very own little princess. Or my new little shit :)

I didn't realize after Odin died how dependent I was on him and me,

he was my everything. Having a giant teddy bear to cuddle and comfort you is

so much more than i expected. And having four months go past without that was hard.

It took a lot to convince myself that bringing another dog into my life wouldn't be hard or hurt how i felt for Odin. and after a week staring at an ad for this sweet little girl it seemed like fate. So I got her :)

She's been amazing. Totally keeps my mind off all the hard crap the universe throws at me,

and is a compete joy to be around. She melts my heart each day.

So world meet Cleo a very amazingly cute great pryenees that I can't wait

to watch grow up into the fluffiest giant ever!

 "How the hell does a broken heart get back together when its torn apart..."


Today more than ever i want to give up. Just sit here hating myself for ever letting love destroy me. For thinking he was ever really my soul-mate.. Cause soul-mates don't walk out and just delete you from their entire life. After five years of loving someone with everything I have, he left... and left me with nothing but a couple grand in debt and the worst broken heart I could imagine. I thought after Odie died right there in our arms as we were crying and cursing and hoping he'd just come back, we'd be stronger. That our life meant so much more. That a little fight couldn't/ or wouldn't break us. But i was wrong. So here I am balling my eyes our wishing I could change everything and not sure where to go or who to even turn to.

I guess that's all my heart can say right now...